Know Your Monsters: Antwerp

The Swordsman’s Alphabet returns next week, hopefully along with a design blog on something I’ve been getting questions about. Today, though, we have the second installment in a new feature: Know Your Monsters.


Level 10

Large Something

Number Appearing: 1

Habitat: Any

The antwerp is among the most feared of all monsters. It has the head of a two-moustached man in a winged helmet, and the body of a giant bouncing ball, the touch of which causes deadly ricochet. It is rumored to have venomous spines on its rearpaws, but no one has ever seen paws of any kind on the creature, so it’s sort of hard to judge. How this creature breeds, feeds or what it wants is completely beyond the ken of adventurers, scholars, and dark lords alike.

No one understands the antwerp, and this is presumed to be its greatest tragedy.


  • Bounce Off: Missing a melee attack causes the adventurer to bounce to ranged attack distance. A move phase is required to get back into position.
  • Bounce On: The antwerp inadvertantly lands on an adventurer, making a melee attack which ignores armor.

6 thoughts on “Know Your Monsters: Antwerp”

  1. “How this creature breeds, feeds or what it wants is completely beyond the ken of adventurers, scholars, and dark lords alike.”

    Clearly you are unfamiliar with the revolutionary work of renowned Mordavian scientist Dr. Cranium and his Transcendental Receiving Animal Processor.

  2. I admit, it has been some years since I studied the good doctor’s works. I thought that, perhaps, the significance ascribed to pizza was experimental bias.

  3. I spent waaaaaaaaay too long trying to kill or capture the Antwerp. I can’t remember if I eventually succeeded, or if that was even possible, but I’ll never forget that living space hopper.

  4. Me, too, Ben. My Antwerp is somewhat less deadly than the original. If you want that truly old school feel…

    “If the Antwerp retreats, it bounces so high that it becomes invisible to the naked eye. 1d6 days later, during wilderness travel, the Antwerp comes plummeting from the sky towards the hero who does the most damage. Make a saving throw against death; on a failure, the PC is killed.”



    At least in the VGA remake of QFG1, it was possible to open your inventory, get your sword/dagger, and click it on yourself during the time between first seeing the Antwerp shadow appear over you and getting splatted. If you do, the Antwerp will hit the blade and split into a bunch of baby Antwerps that hop away and leave you un-killed.

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